Compassionate: Having a temper or disposition to pity; inclined to show mercy; merciful; having a heart that is tender and easily moved by the distresses, sufferings, wants and infirmities of others.
"There never was a heart truly great and generous, that was not also tender and compassionate". - unknown
I have been thinking on this word for two days (I know, one day is all I should take per word). Yesterday I thought I actually felt some compassion as I listened to my Mother and her brother talk about the difficulty their sister is having. Her children are fighting over her money. One group of children kidnapped her from her home with one child (who has loving cared for her for years) to a different state and declared her incompetent and she is now in a care facility with two broken hips. All for the want of her money which they felt they were entitled to and was being spent on her care instead of on them. Shameful. While I listened I felt a small measure of compassion for my aunt and my caregiver cousin who have been dreadfully wronged.
Today, my neighbor, who has had many traumatizing experiences in her life, which have altered her ability to reason (and this makes it incredibly difficult to interact with her) came over today unexpected. I was quick to realize that when I first met her I felt pity for her and wanted to help her. As I've come to know her I've grown to mistrust her completely and I feel no compassion for her at all but rather frustration, annoyance and a bit of anger. This is not something I am proud of. I should still feel compassion...but I don't. Not for her. This is something that I know is wrong and I need to fix my heart to feel compassion for her...for everyone.
I already knew that I am not quick to feel compassion for everyone but I am not completely void of it either. But these last two days have opened my eyes to just how lacking my life is because of my lack of compassion.
My Sister says that being compassionate leads to service and you can't have one with the other. I tend to agree. What kind of person does that make me? I look back to the quote at the beginning of this post. My heart must not be great and generous but I would like it to be, which means I must learn to be compassionate - always.
So, I asked myself a question; What am I going to do to be a compassionate person? As of right now - I still do not know.
I want more from you. ;) I keep looking at your blog for more! I understand getting stuck on a word for a while though. I have enjoyed the freedom to just soak it up and make sure I get it down.
ReplyDeleteBut I wanted you to know... you're being watched! LOL!
Crystal, I keep looking to see what you have to share with me. I am desperate for feeling like someone else is having a good experience with this. This really is an amazing program. I hope you can embrace it and keep moving forward. I have decided that getting familiar with each word is a really good beginning so I will move through the 90 days and then go back and dwell on the hard ones for a while. Create spiritually...or plant the seed...and then actually create.
ReplyDeleteI am looking forward to your posts.