Compassionate: Having a temper or disposition to pity; inclined to show mercy; merciful; having a heart that is tender and easily moved by the distresses, sufferings, wants and infirmities of others.
"There never was a heart truly great and generous, that was not also tender and compassionate". - unknown
I have been thinking on this word for two days (I know, one day is all I should take per word). Yesterday I thought I actually felt some compassion as I listened to my Mother and her brother talk about the difficulty their sister is having. Her children are fighting over her money. One group of children kidnapped her from her home with one child (who has loving cared for her for years) to a different state and declared her incompetent and she is now in a care facility with two broken hips. All for the want of her money which they felt they were entitled to and was being spent on her care instead of on them. Shameful. While I listened I felt a small measure of compassion for my aunt and my caregiver cousin who have been dreadfully wronged.
Today, my neighbor, who has had many traumatizing experiences in her life, which have altered her ability to reason (and this makes it incredibly difficult to interact with her) came over today unexpected. I was quick to realize that when I first met her I felt pity for her and wanted to help her. As I've come to know her I've grown to mistrust her completely and I feel no compassion for her at all but rather frustration, annoyance and a bit of anger. This is not something I am proud of. I should still feel compassion...but I don't. Not for her. This is something that I know is wrong and I need to fix my heart to feel compassion for her...for everyone.
I already knew that I am not quick to feel compassion for everyone but I am not completely void of it either. But these last two days have opened my eyes to just how lacking my life is because of my lack of compassion.
My Sister says that being compassionate leads to service and you can't have one with the other. I tend to agree. What kind of person does that make me? I look back to the quote at the beginning of this post. My heart must not be great and generous but I would like it to be, which means I must learn to be compassionate - always.
So, I asked myself a question; What am I going to do to be a compassionate person? As of right now - I still do not know.
Saturday, June 22, 2013
Thursday, June 20, 2013
CONTRITE
20 June 2013
I realize it has been a week and I have been contemplating one word for seven days now. That's not how it's supposed to work (one word every day) but I couldn't move forward. I was very dissatisfied with my experience with the word and I knew I wasn't getting it.
This is the first definition I found from the Merriam-Webster online dictionary.
CONTRITE: feeling or showing sorrow and remorse for a sin or shortcoming.
I really felt that this was incomplete and that there was much more to the word than I had found. Then a friend of mine brought to my attention the Noah-Webster dictionary which was based on Christianity. I found what I was looking for at http://1828.mshaffer.com
CONTRITE: Literally, worn or bruised. Hence, broken-hearted for sin; deeply affected with grief and sorrow for having offended God; humble; penitent; as a contrite sinner.
This definition fit with what I knew to be true. I knew being contrite wasn't just sorrow or remorse. I can say, "oops, sorry", and not be contrite even if I did feel sorry for doing or saying something that hurt someone else.
I was asked to give a devotional at a meeting with our presidency. Since I was thinking about the word contrite I decided that I would try to convey the meaning of contrite as described in the 1828 Noah-Webster dictionary. I related the following:
When I was a child of three years old it became necessary for me to have corrective heart surgery. I won't bother with the technical name but let's just say I had a heart valve that went "swish" instead of "thump". That's easy to understand. Needless to say, I was a lethargic and quiet child because my heart was damaged and weak.
In 1974 the doctors where not nearly as efficient with my particular surgery as they are now. The surgery was risky and invasive (I have the large scar to prove it). My heart, in order to be fixed of its problem, had to be manipulated so it could be reached with ease; displayed for all involved to see the procedure; cut in order to remove scar tissue; pierced with sutures to force the muscle to work properly; and bruised as it was placed back in its proper location.
My heart was traumatized during surgery and I was watched closely during recovery.
I did recover.
My heart is strong.
I have a greater understanding of what contrite truly means. We have to be broken before we can get better. We have to be manipulated to uncover the damage that we have done. At times our weaknesses are on display for everyone else to see. The unwanted things have to be removed, cut out. We have to change in order to be better. It's not easy. But it is so worth the reward.
I now know what it is to be contrite. It's painful. It's extremely sorrowful. It's real. It's necessary. And, afterward, there is healing. There is strength. There is love.
I realize it has been a week and I have been contemplating one word for seven days now. That's not how it's supposed to work (one word every day) but I couldn't move forward. I was very dissatisfied with my experience with the word and I knew I wasn't getting it.
This is the first definition I found from the Merriam-Webster online dictionary.
CONTRITE: feeling or showing sorrow and remorse for a sin or shortcoming.
I really felt that this was incomplete and that there was much more to the word than I had found. Then a friend of mine brought to my attention the Noah-Webster dictionary which was based on Christianity. I found what I was looking for at http://1828.mshaffer.com
CONTRITE: Literally, worn or bruised. Hence, broken-hearted for sin; deeply affected with grief and sorrow for having offended God; humble; penitent; as a contrite sinner.
This definition fit with what I knew to be true. I knew being contrite wasn't just sorrow or remorse. I can say, "oops, sorry", and not be contrite even if I did feel sorry for doing or saying something that hurt someone else.
I was asked to give a devotional at a meeting with our presidency. Since I was thinking about the word contrite I decided that I would try to convey the meaning of contrite as described in the 1828 Noah-Webster dictionary. I related the following:
When I was a child of three years old it became necessary for me to have corrective heart surgery. I won't bother with the technical name but let's just say I had a heart valve that went "swish" instead of "thump". That's easy to understand. Needless to say, I was a lethargic and quiet child because my heart was damaged and weak.
In 1974 the doctors where not nearly as efficient with my particular surgery as they are now. The surgery was risky and invasive (I have the large scar to prove it). My heart, in order to be fixed of its problem, had to be manipulated so it could be reached with ease; displayed for all involved to see the procedure; cut in order to remove scar tissue; pierced with sutures to force the muscle to work properly; and bruised as it was placed back in its proper location.
My heart was traumatized during surgery and I was watched closely during recovery.
I did recover.
My heart is strong.
I have a greater understanding of what contrite truly means. We have to be broken before we can get better. We have to be manipulated to uncover the damage that we have done. At times our weaknesses are on display for everyone else to see. The unwanted things have to be removed, cut out. We have to change in order to be better. It's not easy. But it is so worth the reward.
I now know what it is to be contrite. It's painful. It's extremely sorrowful. It's real. It's necessary. And, afterward, there is healing. There is strength. There is love.
COMPOSED
13 June 2013
I missed a day. :(
COMPOSED: Free from agitation. Calm. Tranquil. Collected. Cool. Nonchalant.
My first personal observation is that I may seem composed on the outside but am less than composed on the inside. Generally I can be composed if there are no outside influences (i.e. bills, children, pone calls) but that is not possible.
I missed a day. :(
COMPOSED: Free from agitation. Calm. Tranquil. Collected. Cool. Nonchalant.
My first personal observation is that I may seem composed on the outside but am less than composed on the inside. Generally I can be composed if there are no outside influences (i.e. bills, children, pone calls) but that is not possible.
CLEAN
11 June 2013
CLEAN: To remove all foreign matter from; to separate from any thing whatever is extraneous to it, or whatever is foul, noxious, or offensive, as dirt or filth from the hands, body or clothes, foul matter from a vessel, weeds, shrubs and stones from a meadow; to purify. Thus, a house is cleaned by sweeping and washing; a field is cleaned by plowing and hoeing.
I found this definition at http://1828.mshaffer.com
Today I planted tomatoes and peppers in 90+ degree weather and when I was done I was ready to take a shower and be clean. I purposely waited until after my outside chores were done. It was wonderful to be clean.
My teenage girl cleaned the cat litter.
We messed up the kitchen and the my niece was kind enough to clean up after us.
I tried to eat clean food today. I made it until about 3:00 this afternoon but homemade pot stickers kinda bombed my clean eating efforts.
On to a new day.
CLEAN: To remove all foreign matter from; to separate from any thing whatever is extraneous to it, or whatever is foul, noxious, or offensive, as dirt or filth from the hands, body or clothes, foul matter from a vessel, weeds, shrubs and stones from a meadow; to purify. Thus, a house is cleaned by sweeping and washing; a field is cleaned by plowing and hoeing.
I found this definition at http://1828.mshaffer.com
Today I planted tomatoes and peppers in 90+ degree weather and when I was done I was ready to take a shower and be clean. I purposely waited until after my outside chores were done. It was wonderful to be clean.
My teenage girl cleaned the cat litter.
We messed up the kitchen and the my niece was kind enough to clean up after us.
I tried to eat clean food today. I made it until about 3:00 this afternoon but homemade pot stickers kinda bombed my clean eating efforts.
On to a new day.
CLEAR
10 June 2013 Continued...
CLEAR: Bright. Luminous. Untroubled. Serene. Clean. Pure. Transparent. Unmistakable. Innocent.
I've had a headache for most of the day so my mind has not been clear.
Does the word trans"parent" mean that it is important for a successful parent to be all the definitions of clear? It makes sense. A parent should be bright, serene, clean, pure, unmistakeable...transparent. There would be no question as to a parent's intent and love if we were very "clear".
Interesting...yes.
CLEAR: Bright. Luminous. Untroubled. Serene. Clean. Pure. Transparent. Unmistakable. Innocent.
I've had a headache for most of the day so my mind has not been clear.
Does the word trans"parent" mean that it is important for a successful parent to be all the definitions of clear? It makes sense. A parent should be bright, serene, clean, pure, unmistakeable...transparent. There would be no question as to a parent's intent and love if we were very "clear".
Interesting...yes.
Contained
10 June 2013
Yesterday I started the Every Woman a CEO (EWaCEO) 90-day word program. I fell asleep with my little girl last night and am now just writing about my experience.
CONTAINED: restrained, prevented from advancing, enclosed or bound. Hold. Calm
It wasn't natural for me to think about this word and I didn't much. But, I realized I did think upon it occasionally. So, the program must be working because I wouldn't have thought about it at all without this exercise.
There was one moment I could have contained my temper. It wasn't out of control but I wasn't calm. I could have contained it better.
I recognized my little girl's energy as not being contained. If I could channel her energy like a river is then that would be better. Then her energy would be contained in a meaningful boundary.
My bank account isn't contained. The money keeps getting out. :) But, it is going to meaningful places like medical bills and food.
I do believe this 90-day word program is going to work.
Yesterday I started the Every Woman a CEO (EWaCEO) 90-day word program. I fell asleep with my little girl last night and am now just writing about my experience.
CONTAINED: restrained, prevented from advancing, enclosed or bound. Hold. Calm
It wasn't natural for me to think about this word and I didn't much. But, I realized I did think upon it occasionally. So, the program must be working because I wouldn't have thought about it at all without this exercise.
There was one moment I could have contained my temper. It wasn't out of control but I wasn't calm. I could have contained it better.
I recognized my little girl's energy as not being contained. If I could channel her energy like a river is then that would be better. Then her energy would be contained in a meaningful boundary.
My bank account isn't contained. The money keeps getting out. :) But, it is going to meaningful places like medical bills and food.
I do believe this 90-day word program is going to work.
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
Welcome!
Welcome to my Blog! This blog will include my personal musing, things I've created, little anecdotes and most anything else I feel like posting. Isn't that what blogs are for? I really hope you enjoy this blog and that it will be positive, fun, and informative.
Feel free to comment - I love to hear what people have to say. I only ask that your comments are rated G. My three babies read this too. Thanks!
Feel free to comment - I love to hear what people have to say. I only ask that your comments are rated G. My three babies read this too. Thanks!
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